:(

my phone got confiscated 2 day :(. i think i deserved it either way, i was chatting with a friend in class (as always) but i need 2 stop doing that, i rlly want to spend less time on my phone

i already told my friend about it. im kinda sad bc i dont know my friend irl so this is the only way we can communicate, and i love talking with them and there’s also the fact we have a 7 hour time difference, so most of the times when we’re free we cant talk because one of us is asleep ;-;. anyway, i hope they dont react badly about it. maybe i could wake up earlier to text them, idk. but they’re pretty much my only close friend so…yeah.

at least i will have more time 2 draw, maybe i could start deleting other socials (except tumblr, i have good memories there) and maybe i could start making stuff or paying more attention. but im sure as hell i wont take out my phone again in class.

cool person i found online!!!

a few weeks ago, i watched a movie called nothing except everything
it was…decent, bad, if you think about it wayy to hard. vibes weren’t strong, script was nonsensical, only good thing was the music tbh (imo it carried the film)

but the sole reason i got obsessed with it is bc it represented every fear i have about how my own art might turn out, and how it reflected most of the things i dislike about myself. tbh, it did made me reflect a lot about the current state of my art, and somehow ive came to the conclusion that i wont be doomed if i work hard and dont take myself very seriously (the last thing might not be beneficial, but im trying my best im just 14 either way i dont have shit figured out)

so one day scrolling on letterboxd, i found someone who felt the same about it. it was nice, they geniuenly seemed like a nice person and well…ig i just had a LOT of empathy for them. i commented on their review and i followed them back. i hope they’re doing well rn

this might seem simple, but it meant a lot to me. we might not talk anymore, but seriously i hope they do well. they seem to be really trying, and thats admirable. they seem to have genuine passion for film, and thats great too. it felt warm, that interaction, and seriously they have good taste in film lol.

hope they do well. hope everyone who unsatisfied with their art does well 2.